


Please Eat

by PassThe_Mayo



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Anorexic! Virgil, Best friend Remy, Deceit is Damien and Denis, Depressed Virgil, Jock Roman, M/M, Suicidal Virgil, Teacher Logic | Logan Sanders, Virgil just needs a fucking hug, counselor Patton, deceit is depicted in two guys
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-03
Updated: 2019-07-21
Packaged: 2019-07-27 19:19:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 9
Words: 9,356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16225625
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PassThe_Mayo/pseuds/PassThe_Mayo
Summary: I don't care where you've been, how many miles, I still love you





	1. PLEASE READ

I have decided that I should rewrite this story. It'll be better I promise


	2. Car Ride, Car Accident

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I don't care where you've been, how many miles, I still love you

<https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_raPstxxoc>

Virgil’s POV:

It was two in the afternoon and I was on a car ride from my house to Florida to meet my boyfriend’s extended family. It was a thanksgiving feast and I had been invited. He really didn’t have to though. We were driving peacefully until it started to rain. At first it was light rain, barely noticeable, until it turned into heavy rain, the kind you can hardly see in. The world around me turns bright white and the sound of brakes failing fills my ears. Then a loud crash resonates in the area.I was out for a while until I woke up to people murmuring and someone calling an ambulance. I opened my eyes only to see that Denis had been flung into the wheel, his head bashed harshly. My door had been smashed in, causing the jagged metal to be lodged in my side. The whole car had been flipped over and the windshield was gone as well as a couple windows. And then someone was pulling me out of the car and then it’s all just dark. When I woke up again I was in the ICU and hooked up to machines. My dad was sitting in a chair, reading a book. Or at least trying to. He was worried, I could tell. When he noticed I was awake he immediately put his book down and rushed to my side. "Hey, how do you feel?" he asked softly, running his fingers through my hair. I could barely mumble a coherent word from all the drugs they put me on. But I was alive and that was all that mattered to dad. It was weeks before they could take me off of most of those drugs. I was in the hospital for almost a year after that, going to multiple therapy sessions every day while trying to catch up in school work so that I wouldn’t fall behind. Patton would visit most of the time, saying that dad needed to rest after worrying about me for weeks on end. I know my dad and I know that he isn’t resting, he’s pacing around the house worrying about me while still trying to keep up with his schedules and by the time he’s done with work he’s passed out on the couch in a fitful sleep. My dad doesn’t rest, he worries. Patton often told me that I was being dramatic whenever I said dad doesn’t rest just like he often dismissed my bullying issue, my inability to concentrate in class and so many other things. He always said ‘You’re a teenager. All teenagers dramatize the truth a bit.’ I don’t think that’s always true but Patton is so ignorant that explaining it wouldn’t matter. I just kind of stopped telling him things, prefering to go to dad instead. Once I was finally released from the hospital to go home I had fallen asleep in the car. I woke up in enough time to avoid getting in another wreck by screaming at Patton to ‘Watch the fucking road!’ If I hadn’t woken up we would’ve gotten hit by a semi truck and I don’t think I would’ve survived another round. After we got home I swore I would never get into a vehicle unless I absolutely had to.


	3. Nightmare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wait, something doesn't feel right

Virgil’s POV:

I woke up in a cold sweat, tears running down my face like a river. It was two in the afternoon,

on my car ride with Denis to his extended family in Florida in my dream. We were smiling and joking and it all went horribly wrong again. The crash happened again and all I could see was Denis’ head bashed into the wheel and the metal in my side, slowly killing me. I stayed on my bed and cried for a few more minutes before it all reduced to sniffles and small tears still escaping. I slowly and reluctantly peeled myself from the warm haven that I called a bed before stumbling exhaustedly into my bathroom. I took a glance at my face in the mirror. My bright blue eyes held fear, pain and sadness in them. My hair was messy and dirty, I should really take a shower or something I guess. I had dark bags under my eyes, showing how little I actually sleep. The one good thing I liked about myself were my freckles that looked kind of like tiny stars sprinkled on my cheeks and the bridge of my nose. Denis used to stare at me so intently and count every freckle he could before I told him to cut it out because his stare was always scary. I splashed some water on my face and tried to get myself out of memory lane. I need to forget him already, he’s not here anymore. I sighed and dried my face off before returning to my room and glaring at the clock. I really didn’t want to go to school after all that’s happened. Patton will probably try and force me into the car, knowing him. He’s a great guy he’s just really fucking dumb sometimes. I grabbed a random shirt and my favorite jacket from my closet, my typical black skinny jeans from my dresser and a FOB beanie to dress in. I went with my normal makeup which was foundation that was so pale and it still didn’t match my skin, a tiny bit of mascara, eyeliner on the waterline and some eyeshadow smudged under my eyes because I always had that kind of edge to my style. I finished getting ready and grabbed my phone before making my way down the hall to the kitchen. Patton was making pancakes and dad was grading papers as usual. Our cat, a brown scottish fold named Scout, was playing with our bulldog puppy, Alaska under the table. Patton had adopted them in hopes of giving me some sort of comfort after everything that happened. I sat down in my seat and got on my phone, scrolling through Tumblr and looking at all the wonderfully dark poetry I had gained a liking to. My favorite piece was something that a user named heylittlegirl wrote called Crash.

**_Crash_ **

_A blade that taints the skin_

_A heart that cries for rest_

_A person that wants to be loved_

_A car that curves too far_

_Her life is falling around her_

_And the pieces disappear upon touching the ground_

_She lost her friends_

_She lost her lover_

_She lost her control_

_And now it’s all over_

I don't exactly know why, I was just always drawn to this poem. I was taken from my scrolling to Patton placing a plate of pancakes in front of me. I wasn’t exactly hungry right now but I’m also not entirely sure how to tell Patton this without getting both him and dad concerned. I decided to eat half a pancake before pushing the plate away and standing up. I heard Patton’s noise of protest before dad whispered to him that it was nothing against him, I just don’t eat much and that it was perfectly normal. I went back to my room to grab my bag and while I was making sure I had everything my phone went off. I used the same ringtone for Denis as I did my best friend Remy which was a stupid idea because now I’m sitting in the corner of my room, crying and hyperventilating from the memories of the crash. Every detail was still in my mind and it was still striking fear in me just as bad as it did when I was still in that car with the metal in my side.

“Virgil? Virgil! Calm down, breathe. It’s okay. Hey, look at me. You’re okay. You’re alright.” dad spoke softly and gently, trying to calm me down. “In for four, hold for seven, out for eight, okay?” It took me a few tries before I could get my breathing under control but my mind was still racing and every event was still plaguing me. “Can you tell me five things you can feel?”

“Y-Your shirt...um...the floor...the wall...m-my jacket...and...um...how cold it is..” I stuttered out. I was still trying to focus on keeping my breathing under control.

“Now four things you can see?”

“You...my bed….my art and….my tv..” I was focusing so much on keeping my breathing steady and what dad was asking me that I didn’t realize I’d stopped thinking about the accident. Dad ran his fingers through my hair gently, holding me close in his arms. I clung to him and let him comfort me until Patton came in.

“We’re going to be late. Come on already.”

“Sorry Pat. Virgil had an attack. Speaking of, what set it off?” My phone let out a little ding which startled me and made me jump a little, answering dad’s question. Patton picked up my phone and handed it to me which I gladly took. It was, of course, Remy.

**Remyboi: Hey, boo, where are you?**

**Remyboi: You’ve missed, like, a lot of school**

**Remyboi: why won’t you talk to me?**

**Anxiousmess: sorry i was gone for so long**

**Anxiousmess: i was in an accident**

**Anxiousmess: ill tell you about it at school, k?**

**Remyboi: Fine. And learn some grammar, boo**

**Remyboi: Your spelling is atrocious**

**Anxiousmess: ah, you know i never will**

I smiled a little and turned my phone off. Remy was such an amazing friend sometimes. I got up from dad’s embrace and wiped away my tears with a small sniffle.

“You ready to go now?” Patton asked. I nodded and watched dad get up before we all grabbed what we needed and made our way to the car. I was on edge the whole ride to school, scared that I would get into another accident and lose yet another person I cared about. When we finally pulled up to the school I got out of the car as fast as I could and ran up to Remy who was waiting at the front entrance for me. We hugged for probably ten minutes before we had to let go of each other and start heading to class. I told Remy everything that happened and he listened very intently. He comforted me after and was pretty sad himself because Denis was actually a really nice guy and he treated me like I was royalty. He was one of the star quarterbacks on our football team, a straight A student and volunteered for many events all the time. He was fucking perfect and the best part was that he never judged anyone for who they were.

“Denis was so amazing and wonderful. It’s such a shame that he passed. I loved watching him put silly gifts in your locker and then seeing the surprise on your face when you found them. Oh! Or when he’d come up behind you and pick you up just to make you squeak. God, you guys were so fucking cute!” I smiled and nodded with a sigh.

“Yeah. He was pretty great. He was planning on giving me a promise ring in front of his relatives. He was gonna do this whole thing as, like, coming out and asking me to be his forever and I would’ve said yes. I would’ve said so much to him. He was gonna get down on one knee and give me the ring and be all cute, like, he was gonna say ‘I know we’re still teens and stuff but will you be my future husband’ and stuff. He even practiced with his mom for days just for me. I wish he were still here, Remy,” I said softly, wiping away a few stray tears. Remy nodded and pulled me into a side hug.

“I know. But we’ll get through this, okay? I’m here for you. I nodded and leaned into him, wiping away more tears. First period was spent doing nothing but talking and crying about Denis and the accident. Once the bell rang for second period, Remy and I had to split our ways and walk to class alone. I had math and he had Theatre but we would text through all of second period all the time. I chose my normal seat in the back of my math class and sat in silence for a moment before a kind of cute but angry looking boy came up to me.

“Excuse me, you’re in my seat” he said sassily. His honey blonde hair was styled almost like Liam Hemsworth’s hairstyle but his hair was a little bit longer than Hemsworth’s. His eyes were such a pretty shade of green, almost like an emerald green with flakes of golden brown and blue mixed in. He was wearing the red letterman jacket that all jocks wore with a white shirt underneath and black skinny jeans. He was beautiful, honestly.

“I always sit here,” I said softly, averting my gaze a bit.

“I’ve never seen you before so nice try. You must be new or something. This is my seat and it has been for a year now.” Dad walked in and immediately noticed the issue, sighing loud enough for everyone to hear.

“Roman just find another seat. Virgil sat there before you came here so leave him be.”

“There is no way he sat there! I’ve never seen him before since I came to this school,” Roman yelled.

“Yeah, I was in an accident, dumbass. Haven’t you heard? It was all over the news for a solid month while I was in recovery. Everyone knows.” I retorted, going onto Tumblr on my phone.

“Virgil, language. Roman go sit down.”

“This is so unfair!”

“Deal with it. This is my seat. My name is even carved into the desk if you haven’t noticed. Which, by the way dad, I did not do.” Roman just shrieked again and found a different seat in the back so dad could begin the lesson. When was Remy gonna tell me about the obnoxious eye candy?


	4. Virgil Has A Breakdown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil is slowly losing his patience with Remy and one little thing makes it all snap.

Virgil’s POV:

**Anxiousmess: When were you gonna tell me about obnoxious eye candy?**

**Remyboi: I FORGOT ABOUT ROMAN**

**Anxiousmess: HOW DO YOU FORGET ABOUT OBNOXIOUS PEOPLE WHO ARE ALSO CUTE AF???** **  
** **Remyboi: I’m an idiot with a never-ending cup of Starbucks, what can I say?**

**Anxiousmess: loser, lol**

**Remyboi: ExCuSe yOu! I am TrIgGeReD**

**Anxiousmess: get rekt binch**

**Remyboi: binch don’t call me a binch**

**Anxiousmess: is someone triggered again**

**Remyboi: do your work hoe**

I smiled and put my phone down. Remy is such a drama queen, I swear. I listened to dad blab on about quadratic equations and graphing and other boring math stuff for an hour before the bell rang, signaling lunch time. I grabbed my things and waited for everyone else to leave before walking out myself and heading to the art rooms to eat with Remy. When I got to our normal room Remy was already chatting away with another guy who looked almost like Chris Hemsworth but with brown eyes and dark green hair with blonde roots. He was wearing a black leather jacket, black shirt, black skinny jeans and all black converse. When they noticed me in the room they stopped talking and Remy dragged me over to the table they were sitting at.

“Virgie this is Damien. He came here the same time Roman did and he’s a jock but he hates the red letterman jacket. It’s tacky anyways.” Remy said, sitting me down between him and Damien.

“Are there any other new kids I should know about? It’s getting kind of scary how many surprises there are.”

“Nah, just the two. So Damien, please fill our darling Virgil in on where you came from.”

“Well, I’m actually Denis’s cousin. Distant cousin, technically. I only saw him on holidays since I lived in Brazil for a long time. Most of my life, actually. Little Denny was a great person. It’s a shame he’s gone.”

“Yeah...I uh...I miss him too…….can we um...can we not talk about him? It just..it brings up bad memories...the crash and all...it just...it was like mom all over again…” Remy instantly went into mom-mode and grabbed my hand.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize it was that traumatic for you.” I suddenly snapped for no reason, really.

“Well yeah, I was in a fucking accident, Remy! Of course it was traumatic for me! Your call this morning sent me into a goddamn panic attack! And seriously, going into your little ‘mom-mode’ just throws me back into the past because you act the same way she did and I can’t stand another fucking minute of this fake pity from you! I know how you are! You didn’t text me for a whole fucking year, and I checked my phone Remy! It was a huge fucking mistake coming back to this place. To you. To all of it.” I got up, grabbed my stuff and stormed out of the room, leaving Remy and Damien to wonder what the fuck just happened. But neither of them stopped me and that’s what made me keep walking until I was literally in my bedroom. I don’t even remember getting to my house but the evidence is all there. The bag tossed angrily by the door, the phone nearly broken by the actually broken full mirror and the opened window I never seem to lock. I was curled up in my bed, my blankets covering my too-thin form and the pillow covering my tear-stained face. I was a shitty, horrible, no good, unlovable mess and I deserve nothing but pain.


	5. Secrets Untold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil breaks more and spills the things he's never said before

Virgil’s POV:

I woke up to dad and Patton coming home. It was around 4 so I had been sleeping for a few hours at the least. I sat up and looked around my room, fully taking in the damage I had actually done. The mirror was broken entirely and glass had been scattered on the ground. My books had all been tossed from the shelves and were lying on the ground, some of them opened and their pages ruined. My phone was lying next to the mirror, a large crack across the screen and other, smaller cracks in the corner. The art I had taken so much care into hanging on my walls had been torn down and thrown in the trash or ripped into pieces and scattered like the glass was. I really had quite the fit, it seemed. I got out of my bed and walked over to grab my phone before leaving my room and making my way into the kitchen where dad and Patton were talking. Their worried whispers silenced when I entered the kitchen.

"Where have you been?" dad asked, looking at me. I shrugged and walked over to the fridge to find something to drink as crying for hours dehydrates you pretty quick.

"The teachers you had after lunch were all worried. You hadn't shown up to the lessons!" Patton sounded concerned and scared but I ignored it, grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge and heading back towards my room. I had a lot of cleaning to do.

"Virgil! Where are you going?" 

"Back to my room. Just go back to your quiet whispers and leave me alone," I snapped, retreating to my room and locking the door. 

It had been three hours since the three of us talked to each other. My room was cleaned up and I had started to paint my walls instead of hanging up artwork in case I had another breakdown. The three of us were now silently sitting at the dinner table, a big meal in front of us as they ate and I picked at the mashed potatoes with my fork in disgust. They really chose the calorie bucket today for dinner with 214 in mashed potatoes, 745 in sirloin steak and 41 in carrots. I had decided to only eat the carrots which were already gone before my fork even touched the mashed potatoes. 

"Virgil, please just eat the fucking potatoes," dad snapped, clearly annoyed. I shoved the plate away from me and stood up to leave when Patton gave me a look.

"Virgil, sit back down and finish your food," he said. It's like they wanted me to be fat. I still ignored them, though and went back to my room to finish painting my walls. I was in the middle of painting a little farm in one of the corners when dad came in, clearly unhappy. I still ignored him in favor of finishing my painting.

"Virgil."

"Yes, can I help you?" I still didn't look at him as I painted. So far I had painted a little village one one of my walls and this farm was the last part of it. I planned on painting a galaxy on my ceiling and a character of mine on the wall behind my bed. 

"First off, why are you painting your walls? What happened to all those pictures?" I shrugged and kept painting.

"Those were all shit anyways. I'm sure you're here for something else so just say it." He sighed and I heard him moving towards my bed before he sat down.

"I know that going back to school is hard right now but you can't just skip whenever something minor inconveniences you. You've gotta keep going," he said. 

"Remy being a fake friend is hardly minor but okay. And that new kid making me the spotlight when my morning was already shit totally wasn't minor but yeah, minor inconvenience." I moved to another part of the wall I was working on and started drawing grey and black silhouettes of people to show the village had life.

"What happened to you? You used to let those kinds of things go. You used to ignore all of it. And now you're just going off at the smallest things." I scoffed and shook my head.

"You try losing everything that made you happy and come back the same. He was the one thing that could make me smile anymore. I was getting better and then he was gone and it hurts. So excuse me for trying to find some sense of normality after everything I've gone through! I had to watch her, you know. When you were off getting drunk, I had to watch her cry and hurt herself and I was there when she wrote the letter. I had to watch her swallow those pills as I wondered where you were and why mommy was so sad. I was ten years old and I had to watch my mother kill herself." He had nothing to stay as I kept painting and talking. "And then I had to raise myself because you were too busy drinking and hooking up to care for me. I got to see you come home with Patton on your arm and then as if by magic you remembered you had a child who was now thirteen years old and told me you were getting married. Tossed her things out like she never existed and never once mentioned her again. Did you even care that I saw her kill herself? Did you even remember what she sounded like?" I finally turned to face him with tears in my eyes, seeing that he was shocked. And then I saw Patton in the doorway, tears falling down his face as he too seemed shocked.

"Virgil..I-" I shook my head and went back to painting my wall.

"Just go. Leave me alone since you clearly have nothing to say." And he did. He left without another word and I was alone to break down and cry for the umpteenth time again today. I'm just so tired of it all.


	6. A Life Of Grief

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Logan tells us everything that Virgil didn't know

Logan's POV:

Some nights when Patton and Virgil have fallen asleep and the house is quiet I can hear her. She's singing the same lullaby she used to use to put Virgil to sleep when he had night terrors. I remember her laugh and the way her eyes crinkled and her nose scrunched when she smiled. She had been an amazing wife but after Virgil came along I had realized I didn't love her like I should have. I had never been in love with anyone, I had realized. When she killed herself it was because of me and I knew it. We were in the middle of filing our divorce and I was often going to the bar to sort my thoughts while I left her and Virgil alone. 

I met Patton at the bar four days before she killed herself and I fell in love. I came home that night to find her crying in our room while Virgil was watching Disney. I talked to her and she had signed the papers and said she'd be gone in a few days. That was the last time we slept in the same bed together. I remember holding her one last time, telling her that I still cared for her but the spark she had for me was not the same in my own heart for her. She was heartbroken and I knew that, I just didn't know how badly she had been hurt. 

The last few times I saw her she was wearing the same cardigan that hangs in Virgil's closet now. She had started smoking and beyond that I had no idea what she had been doing because I had been at the bar looking for Patton. 

The day she died was the worst day. I had come home not from the bar but from work. I was tired and wanted to spend time with her and Virgil before she headed off with him to somewhere better. I had been dragged into my room by Virgil's tiny hands to find her lying on the bed, tear stains on her cheeks, an empty pill bottle on the ground and her lifeless body curled in on herself. If you hadn't seen the tears or the bottle you would've thought she was sleeping. But Virgil and I knew better.

Virgil had been quiet in the days after her funeral so I was often gone to either work and support him financially or I was at the bar grieving and talking to Patton. I brought him home with me three years later and Virgil immediately changed. Or it seemed immediate, at least. He was more closed off and distant and refused to make any interaction with Patton. I should have noticed something was wrong then and I should've tried to help him. Instead, I let Patton stay, married him and let him move in.

When Virgil came home smiling after his first day as an eight grader I knew he'd had a good day. He had made a friend and they planned on hanging out over the weekend. When he brought the friend home I wasn't too surprised to find he had a similar style to Virgil's. His leather jacket and shades gave off the 'cool guy's vibe he had clearly been trying to make and his cup of Starbucks told me he was popular, someone Virgil would never hang out with as a young child. Remy had proved to be an amazing friend and never hurt Virgil. He even introduced Virgil to Denis in freshman year. The two eventually got together in the middle of the year and Virgil had been so happy. I'd stopped bringing up his mother's death date and birthday and I hid all of the things I kept that belonged to her. I didn't want him to be sad anymore.

And then the crash happened during spring break of sophomore year. I had been terrified and I was constantly checking up on him for almost a year, wanting nothing more than for him to live. Denis had been announced dead on arrival and Virgil had been hanging on a thread. I should have realized how much he was going to change and how bad he was going to get. Now here I am in my room with Patton and a son in his room, breaking down and tearing himself apart over something he couldn't control.

I'm a horrible father.


	7. Troubled Child

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil continuously gets worse and sneaks out for some fun

_<https://www.fashmates.com/set/5b21ec06163e6403d54e8d54-1563673451792>  (Virgil's outfit at the end)_

Virgil's POV:

I woke up the next morning wrapped around my mother's cardigan. She left her perfume, cigarettes and lighter in the pockets and it still smelled like her. Sometimes I'll go outside and smoke one while wearing the cardigan just to keep it smelling like her and spray some of the perfume on just to have her near me again. I've had to get a new box every so often but I didn't complain because it meant I could still keep her near.

My phone was going off and I could smell pancakes from the kitchen. I looked at my walls, enjoying the view of the village, the farm and the painting of mom above my bed. Her dark brown hair was prettiest when she had it down with the flowers I used to weave into it. Her eyes always reminded me of the lavender that used to grow in our backyard and her smile was a literal ray of sunshine.

My thoughts were swept away when dad opened the door to ask if I was getting ready for school. I didn't want to go and I didn't want to deal with anybody's shit today, I just wasn't in the mood. But doctors notes wouldn't do anything but get me out of gym now so I had to go. That didn't mean I had to dress myself, though. It just meant I had to go to school. So I put my mother's cardigan on over my short sleeve TØP pajama shirt and slipped some vans onto my feet before grabbing my phone, charger and headphones and leaving my room. I didn't bother to do anything else but that.

The kitchen was quiet as we all sat and poked at our pancakes. I refused to eat like usual and they slowly ate theirs. Nobody would say anything to break the awkward silence. I finally just got fed up and pushed my plate away from me before going to wait in the car. What a great morning so far.

 

My first class was noisy as usual when there was a sub instead of Mrs. McNamara. Remy completely avoided me and continuously shot me angry glances as if I was the one at fault here. Halfway through class I just left and went out to the tiny garden behind the school to smoke the first of what was soon to be many cigarettes of the day. The bell for second period rang as soon as I finished my cigarette and I was in the class in no time. Roman was sitting in the seat next to mine but he seemed to get annoyed when I sat down so I didn't attempt any conversation with him. Its not like I would have tried one anyways after yesterday. Dad walked in and began the lesson that I had tuned out once again, this time in favor of playing games on my phone. I knew I would never be able to do anything worthwhile so I never went to the effort of paying attention.

Lunch time was spent smoking behind the school and ignoring the thoughts plaguing my mind. I ignored the texts from dad and Patton and the few from Remy, leaving them all on read. 

 

Third period was quiet and boring like usual from what I remembered of it. Whenever someone asked a question, though, the teacher would get bitchy with them and ask if they were even paying attention. I just kind of tuned it all out. English wasn't even a necessary class anymore, we don't learn anything new.

 

Fourth period came around way too fast as I realized I didn't want to go home. I was far too upset and far too angry with dad and Patton to want to go back for more than five minutes. But I also didn't want to stay at school because it sucked just as much here. I sighed, knowing there was nowhere for me to go but home now.

"Today we're doing partner projects!" Those five dreaded words right when the bell rang brought me from my thoughts. If there was anything worse than school itself, it was partnered projects. One person almost always ends up doing the work and if it's a shitty job everyone pays for those mistakes. "I already chose the partners so once I start calling them out, start moving so that you're next to them." I tuned out the rest of what she said about the project and looked out the window, annoyed that we already had a partner project.

"You gonna keep pouting or are you gonna help me?" That familiar voice could only belong to the boy with the pretty green eyes and honey blonde hair from yesterday. I looked over at him and noticed, for the first time today, he wasn't wearing the leather jacket and his hair was more of a curly mop than Liam Hemsworth type hair. His eyes were the same green with brown and blue flakes, though. 

"Not pouting Prince Charming, ignoring the class is what I'm doing. This project already made me wanna quit trying," I said, sarcasm and a bit of annoyance in my tone. He scoffed and shook his head.

"While Prince Charming is rather handsome, I'm more of a Prince Eric than anything. And you're kind of forced to come to school you nitwit. Just shut up and deal like everyone else." I flipped him off and looked out the window again.

"You can do the project yourself. My grade doesn't mean shit to me and neither does your opinion so don't even try it." I then popped in my ear buds before he could even try to talk to me again. We all know I wouldn't get any of it done and that's just what's going to happen.

 

Twenty minutes have passed since the beginning of class and I'm currently sitting in the office with Roman because I refused to listen to the teacher when she told me to stop walking out of the classroom. Roman had to locate me since I was his project partner and he dragged me all the way to the office after finding me behind the school on my phone. He didn't know I had just finished a cigarette but he also didn't need to know.

"Why the fuck did you do that?" Roman asked, glaring at me. I just shrugged and went on my phone again. "I know I've only known you for a day, I think, but you are infuriating! You completely ditched yesterday and nobody knew where you went. And now today you come in violating so many dress code rules and just being a total jerk to everyone. What is your problem?" 

"I would like to know that too." Dad. I should've known they would call him and pull him out of class.

"Don't act like you don't know what's wrong Logan. I told you last night and it was your choice to listen or not." I continued on with my scrolling and waited for something else to happen.

"Virgil and Roman? And Mr. Berry. Come on in," said the principal. The three of us walked inside and sat down with Roman and Dad in chairs and me on the other table in the room. "Roman, if you could fill us all in on the situation that would be helpful." Roman told them everything that has happened today so far with me refusing to help with the project and then walking out to do god knows what. Dad was now full on glaring at me and the principal seemed exhausted. She must have dealt with a lot of issues today. 

"Yesterday he just straight up left, too. It's like he just doesn't care!" Roman continued. Why does he even care what I do, it's not affecting his daily life and it's not like he didn't have troubled kids at his last school.

"You're new, why do you care? You don't even know me!" I snapped, glaring at him. 

"Virgil, I understand the past year has been hard on you but what you are doing is uncalled for and will help nothing. Why are you just acting out like this?" I ignored the principal in favor of texting Remy to fuck off already. I just want this to be over with so I can go home then sneak out to do whatever the fuck I want to do.

 

We were there for another two hours before the principal gave up and sent us all home to deal with the issue ourselves. The ride home with dad and Patton was quiet and tense but I paid no mind to them as I kept trying to get Remy to fuck off. He just can't get the memo, can he? We were home in what felt like hours and I was quick to retreat to my room before anyone could do anything else. I even locked my door to keep them out which seemed to work. Well, it worked until they wanted me to come down for dinner. Now I was leaning against my door as they pounded on it and demanded I go and eat. I kept refusing their demands and ignoring them.

"Virgil I haven't seen you eat anything for three days now, come out and eat!" Dad yelled, getting angry it seemed.

"You don't have to see me eat to know if I have eaten. I ate something at lunch today," I lied knowing he never sees me during lunch and it was a perfect excuse. "Leave me alone already." They stopped trying to get in and I listened to them leave before stepping away from the door and changing. Once my cat beanie was slipped on I could hear them going to bed. I started packing my backpack with some water, batteries, both of my portable chargers that I had charged all day and two flashlights. I turned off my light and made it look like I was in bed sleeping and turned the location on my phone off so I could do what I wanted. I grabbed all of my money that I had earned over the years and stashed it in my backpack to get what I needed. I unlocked my door quietly and snuck out with ease. I was going to be in a lot of trouble.

 


	8. Punk, Emo, Goth, what are you? A rat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roma just gets more annoyed with Virgil and Virgil doesn't care. He finds the royal pratt just as annoying. But Virgil cares more about having control and soon he'll be spiraling into his obsessive thoughts.

<https://www.fashmates.com/set/5b21ec06163e6403d54e8d54-1563693520628> (Virgil's outfit)

Virgil's POV:

Graffiti isn't vandalism, it's more art. The way I do it is, at least. The spray paint makes it a little messy but it looks amazing nonetheless. Today I've used an old billboard to display my newest work: eyes of different kinds all staring in one direction so everyone driving down the road would feel watched and then underneath in old English type font I put "The government controls us from the news and the news is their eyes into the world." My fingers were stained with color and I was running on pure adrenaline at three in the morning. I was currently running back home, a wide smile on my face and the sound of the spray paint cans clinking together all giving me more energy than I normally have at this time in the morning. I was halfway to the house when I saw police cars going down towards my masterpiece and smiled. Culprit has fled the scene, good sirs!

Instead of going to my room I went to my tree house which was literally a little house for me. I kept all of my art things in it and usually kept myself cooped up inside during the winter working on other projects. I left my backpack in the storage room part with all my extra art supplies. I grabbed a rag from the working sink and cleaned off my fingers to remove any evidence leftover. Once I was done with that, I lit a cigarette and eased myself down a bit because I was getting too worked up with these new feelings. After putting out the cigarette I changed into my clothes from earlier that I left inside the treehouse to give the illusion that I had just snuck out to work on art after not being able to sleep. I hid the sneak out clothes easily and went over to my desk and pulling out a really old piece I never finished. I worked on that until it was time for me to wake up. It was one of my more morbid pieces, a memory type picture from my past. I left it on my desk to dry and grabbed my beanie before going back to my room and slipping in casually right when dad opened the door. The perks of not having him be around me often as a child was that I could lie so easily and he wouldn't notice.

"Where did you sneak off to last night?" he asked, just as I thought he would. So predictable and boring like always.

"Treehouse. I couldn't sleep so I went to work on art. I'm getting dressed so you can leave now." He looked at me skeptically before shrugging and leaving. I got dressed in a more punk type outfit compared to last night's and slipped the beanie on my head. I did something illegal. And got away with it! I had control over something else now. My weight and where my art goes. I was going in the right direction, then.

I felt dad and Patton staring at me as I came down the stairs but I ignored it, choosing to sit on the couch instead and go through my phone. They never said anything, just ate their food quietly and finished getting ready for the day. Once it was time for us to be in the car there was the start of a conversation.

"So why did you choose to wear..that today?" Dad said, gesturing to my makeup and outfit.

"Felt like it. Plus I know it'll really piss Roman off that I'm wearing this. He already thinks I'm annoying." I scrolled through the posts on my phone, seeing a few people posting a picture of the billboard I did. I read some of the comments, many people agreeing that it was creepy as hell. Some people agreed with the statement and there was a full on debate on one of the posts about who made it. None of them were even close which was good for me.

I got many stares when I walked into the building but I ignored them all and made my way to my first class, the same one Remy was in. I sat down in my seat in the back and waited for the inevitable as I scrolled through Insta. Five minutes later the obnoxious brunette comes in and stands right in front of my desk.

"Virgil, come on. Stop being petty. I didn't know how bad the accident was so I didn't know how traumatic it was. I'm sorry!" He said, trying to plead with me.

"Remy it was a fucking car accident. It doesn't matter how severe it's still traumatic. Go take your useless apologies to someone who wants them," I snapped. Apparently that crossed a line, though.

"I've tried being there for you. After your mom and after Denis. I've tried helping you and you just blow it off like it's nothing. Then you turn around and pull this shit where you're this entirely different person. Where's the Virgil that I met in eighth grade? Where's the kid that used to cry when someone played MCR near him?"

"Where's the best friend that didn't ignore me when I needed him the most? Where's the Remy that just wanted to look like the cool kids and was never involved in drama, just looked like it? I'm not the only one who changed. We are in high school, it's been three years. People change in three years. Like it or not, I'm going to be this way. It's not your choice to decide what I do and say. I'm in control of me and you are in control of you. So fuck off and stop trying to talk to me because I've got nothing to say and I'm not gonna listen. Go waste your time on someone else." I watched him stand there for a moment before leaving, finally. I sighed and went back to my phone until another person interrupted me.

"That was a bit rude Jack Smellington," came the voice of Roman Prince. Is this guy in all of my classes? "He seemed to be trying to atone for his mistakes."

"He seemed to be pissing me off with his excuses. And you seem to be pissing me off by getting in my business, princey," I retorted, glaring at the obnoxious blonde haired beauty. How can someone so pretty be so annoying? I watched him scoff and shake his head all dramatically. This dude has to be in theatre or something, I swear.

"There's no need to be so rude to everyone. Try being nice for once." This guy just doesn't know how to drop it!

"There's no need for you to bother me and yet here you are, still talking. It's like you're obsessed with me. Go bother someone else." He seemed annoyed but finally dropped it and went over to the other side of the room, probably to comfort Remy or something. I spent the whole class on my phone and didn't do any work, it didn't matter anyways. Nothing mattered anymore because I know I'm never gonna make it.


	9. Toxic People, Making New Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roman shows us how he feels about Virgil and what he knows about Damien. Mending friendships won't be easy and keeping his new friend safe will be even harder as the troubled teen finds the danger exciting.

Roman's POV:

When I first met Virgil I was entranced. His lavender eyes matched so perfectly with his violet hair and his pale skin looked so soft. I had sat on the other side of the room daydreaming about him and wanting nothing more than to know everything about him. With the way I acted, however, there was no chance of that happening. I had then gone about my day like nothing happened. The next day I was a little surprised he had come to school in his pajamas and a desolate look on his face. He looked as though he had lost everything that mattered to him. When he ran off in fourth period I knew he went to smoke one of the cigarettes he had in his cardigan pocket. I could see the outline of the box and a little bit of the top of it when I sat next to him. It infuriated me that he refused to help on the project and chose to play games on his phone instead.

Today he really took my breath away. He was wearing a lot of piercings and a more punk type of outfit. His tiny waist was made noticeable by the belt he had wrapped around it and had his lips always been that pretty shade of pink? He had been arguing with Remy and I knew that Remy was just trying to get his friend back. I had an okay friendship with Remy and he had come to me yesterday about Virgil, saying he ran off and wouldn't answer his phone. I was the one to reassure Remy and give him advice, advice that clearly backfired. And now I was sitting here with Remy, trying to help him while Virgil just scrolled through his phone. 

"He was never like this before, you know," Remy said, seemingly sad. "He used to be so happy. But then, Denis knew how to make everyone smile." Denis? Who is this Denis and what did he mean to Virgil?

"Who is Denis?" I asked, looking at Remy. He gave me a sad smile before starting.

"Denis was his boyfriend. I was the one who introduced them to each other in Freshman year. And then, last year, they got into an accident. Denis...he never made it. He was planning on asking Virgil to be his forever. Had a promise ring and a plan for the future and everything he needed was set up. He had amazing grades, perfect attendance, many colleges looking at him and he was the star football player. And Virgil was his prince in all of it. I used to watch him put gifts inside Virgil's locker and sometimes he'd come up behind Virge and pick him up. Virgil was always happy and he forgot about his mom. He's just had such a troubled life and I want to help him but he won't let me. He won't let anyone in anymore." Now I had more questions but at least I knew the reason for his current behavior.

"Denis sounds like a great guy. I would've loved to meet him. I have so many more questions now, though," I said, glancing at Virgil who was now falling asleep.

"You can just text me about it next period. The bell's about to ring and Virgil needs someone to wake him up." I nodded and went back over to Virgil who was now full on asleep. His cat eared beanie was falling off his head and he seemed peaceful. I gently shook him which seemed to do the trick as he sat up and stretched a little before looking at me and then glaring.

"What do you want?" He asked, fixing his beanie.

"The bell is about to ring and I wanted to say sorry for getting in your business earlier. I didn't know the full story or what had happened between you two and it wasn't..my place to say anything. I'd like to ask if you want to walk to second together?" He looked at me skeptically before sighing and standing up right when the bell rang.

"Don't expect us to be friends now." We started walking to second period in a comfortable kind of silence. We were halfway there when we ran into Damien, someone I knew all too well. 

"Oh, hey Virgil! Hello Roman. Where are you guys headed to?" He asked, starting to walk with us.

"Math. Where are you supposed to be going?" I asked, a hint of malice in my tone. If there was anyone that Virgil should avoid it was Damien. He was an abuser and often left his victims defenseless after he dumped them. One of my good friends was a victim of his, Emile Picani to be exact. Emile had been happy and carefree, much like Remy. Now he's closed off and shy and has a hard time making friends because he's scared. 

"No need to be malicious, Prince. I'm just headed to Spanish class. I'll leave you two be now, ta ta~" He then slipped off and went to his class. I really despise that guy.

"What was that about, Princey? Old friend?" Virgil asked as we walked into our class and sat down.

"More like old nuisance. He went to the same school as me before I came here. He's a total douche and has a reputation for ruining lives." I pulled out my notes and opened it to a fresh page for today's lesson. I always took notes in this class because I used to suck and I didn't want to fail this class.

"Seems like a nice guy. Definitely the Steal-Your-Girl stereotype, though." Virgil pulled a sucker out of his pocket and popped it in his mouth. Why was he so fucking cute?!

"He's the type of guy that should be in jail. My friend Emile is too scared to press any charges, though." Virgil looked at me, confused.

"Press charges? What'd he do, steal your friend's virginity or something and dump him?" He asked, pulling the bright red lolli out of his mouth with a small pop. I shook my head and sighed.

"He did more than that, I'm afraid. And Emile wasn't the first one. He definitely won't be the last, either if Emile keeps quiet about it," I said, writing down the homework in the corner of my notebook page.

"What is so bad about this guy? He seems like a genuinely nice person. Granted, I was a dick to him because Remy pissed me off and I should apologize for that but he seemed nice." I shook my head again and scooted so my desk was closer to him.

"He abused Emile and raped him and ruined his life. It's in your best interest to stay away if you want to avoid trauma," I whispered before scooting back to my spot and writing down notes.

"Now you're just making stuff up. He seems way too nice to do those things. Maybe Emile made it all up?" He popped the lolli back into his mouth and started to scroll through his phone.

"Countless others had the same story, there is no way he made it up. It's like Ted Bundy, y'know, the murderer that nobody thought was a murderer because he was too handsome to be one?" I looked over at him and he seemed to be entertaining the idea for a moment before shrugging and going back to scrolling.

"Ted Bundy was pretty fucking hot, you can't deny it." I nodded and smiled at him. I knew he was softening up to me which was good. It helped a lot.

"I'm just sayin, I know this guy. I know how he works and I know what he does. He's exactly like Ted Bundy but without the murder. He lures them in with his looks and sweet talk and then when the relationship gets good, he shows his true colors. He's a snake and he's good at hiding who he really is." Virgil smirked and finished off his sucker before tossing the stick into the trash can at the front of the room from his seat. Mr.Berry glared at him but kept going with the lesson. 

"A snake, huh? What kind of snake then cause I kinda like snakes. The animal, not the people," he clarified. His lips were now a bright red instead of that soft pink color they had been earlier. I need to stop being so gay, oh my lord.

"He's like a King Cobra, strikes you when you're blind. He's just bad news. Why don't you believe me? You hardly know the guy. You know more about me than you do him." I felt the question had to be asked. He only shrugged and looked out the window.

"He wasn't mean to me when he first met me, that's a start. But, you do have a point as much as it annoys me to agree. Looks can be deceiving sometimes." He actually agreed with me, thank god!

The rest of the day I hung around Virgil as much as our schedule would let me. We stayed behind the school during lunch and I got him to eat an apple at the very least since I noticed his abnormally thin stomach earlier. Third period was quiet and lonely and in fourth period we just messed around and played games instead of doing our project.

"You wanna come over to my place? I know my dad would prefer I bring over someone rather than going to their house," he suggested. I shrugged and nodded,  texting my mom that I would be staying the night at a friend's house. She replied saying she wanted to know everything tomorrow when I got home.

"Yeah, I can stay. You wanna go tell your dad?" He shook his head and went back to the game of 21 we were playing.

"Nah, now hit or pass?"


End file.
